Free Printables!!!

{Chakra Gallery Wall}

We will break down each one of these as we discuss them week by week over the course of 8 weeks. You will get to experience each one of these and all of the details associated with them  as they relate to your own body. Contact me if you are interested in learning how to get into your body through Prana! <3 willis.katy@gmail.com or 435-339-3274

                               {Love Gallery Wall}

A Big Fat Update...

Out enjoying family time together. <3

I already fell asleep tonight, but now I am completely wide awake again...so I figure tonight is as good as any time to finally dust off this old blog after almost a year's absence. The past 12 months have been so epic for us! It has been the busiest year our family has ever had with many unexpected opportunities and blessings and heartaches...buckle up for a crazy summary!

Mark in Virginia (bragging about his beach front hotel). :)

Mark still works at Freeus, and what an amazing blessing his job is to our family!!! The company has continued to grow exponentially with growth projected to continue with the Baby Boomers. Freeus manufactures, supports, and sells medical alarm devices to dealers which then resell them to users. They came out with a product in recent years that has fall detect and will automatically call for help if a fall is detected. So cool!!! Mark loves that he can work at a job that influences and changes so many lives. These devices are so important to the subscribers to give them peace of mind and necessary help when needed. He hired his replacement as office manager and has recently been working as the Dealer Care Manager (which he loves)! We are grateful for such steady work! Mark has also enjoyed a good amount of travel for work, usually to Virginia and Pennsylvania, but he has a trip to NV coming up soon.

Gavin and Dad on Temple Square.

Mark made it for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saint's recording of The Book of Mormon video recordings last summer! Watch for him in the background of Jacob chapters 2 & 3. He was even right by the prophet Jacob while he preached in those chapters, so who knows just how "famous" his face may be from it. :) It was such a positive experience for him, both the preparation and also the time on the set. What are the chances: he sat next to a Hungarian?! (Mark served a mission for our church to Hungary). Mark got the biggest kick out of switching from English to Hungarian without warning...it took a while for the other guy to recognize what language they was speaking, but totally freaked out once he realized it was Hungarian!:) He said there was such a powerful spirit on the set, and the caliber of the cast was astounding. We are so glad he could do it...but I think Mark is the only one who occasionally misses his beard. :) I am so glad to be done with his pony tail and scruffy beard! :) ...but now he is talking about another year in Savior of the World 2019 Christmas season, so it may be time to start growing again soon.

He has tried his hand at a number of home repairs and renovations lately, and has discovered a newfound hobby that will keep him busy for spare moments to come. :) We have enjoyed redoing the main areas of our home recently, and look forward to more exciting projects.

Dad reading bedtime stories to Leland.

Mark has been our rock this year. He has held down the fort (and then some!) as I have been away from home more than we have ever experienced before in the past. The kids are bouncing up and down as I walk in the door to tell me how Dad "did this" and "said this" and let them "do that." The extra Daddy time this year has been so fun for the kids (and for Mark, too). We have learned so much as a couple and family!

I made this shirt. <3

If I told you about my past 12 months, you
probably wouldn't believe me! :) I still hardly can believe it myself. It has been wild and filled with miracles and opportunities to grow and expand.

Serving the women and families in my stake has been an incredible privilege! I wrote in my journal just this morning that if I were to be released today for some unforeseeable reason, I would be completely at peace. Together with my presidency, the stake presidency, and ward leaders, we have served with the Savior to powerfully influence the women of this stake and their faith in Jesus Christ. I have witnessed miracles, and am living proof that God can take anybody who is willing, no matter how under qualified they may be, and work through them to fulfill His purposes and touch lives for the better. I have loved every minute!

After my 200 hour YTT (Yoga Teacher Training) in 2018, I only have one more weekend to make up (and a retreat that was rescheduled due to weather), and then I will be a certified Hatha yoga instructor!!! Woot! I plan to do another 200 hour YTT starting this spring, but this will be for Kundalini Yoga. We are also tentatively planning a trip for me to NYC for training in yoga therapy for kids who have been through trauma. I will start teaching a Yoga Therapy Prana I Course out of a therapist's office in Logan this fall. We plan to also bring kids yoga to this office after adult yoga is established. I hope to eventually develop (and later teach a YTT) of my own creation of a yoga therapy course for kids who have been through trauma. I also hope to create a mindful parenting/trauma informed parenting course that incorporates yoga. I will be offering 2 free trial yoga movement classes in a few weeks, then if it goes well, will be hired to teach weekly movement classes on an online forum for women with betrayal trauma. So amazing to watch all of this unfold and know that I am exactly where God needs me to be! <3

Shipton and Mom selfie. :)

I also took 3 trips to Atlanta and a trip to Minnesota in 2018 to train in brain wellness, and have been taking a light client load since June for a protocol called QNRT. It has been so fulfilling to be part of people's healing journey in the aftermath of trauma and emotional stress. <3

This week as I was about to leave for a meeting, Shipton said, "Mom, I know that you would rather stay with me instead of go to your meeting if you could because I know that you love me." <3 I am so grateful that he knows that because there have been many, many moments when I have felt torn between home and the demands outside of my home. This has been new (yet exciting) territory for me and my family. After so much time as a homemaker, this has been a big deal to step into the professional world again (and so crazy to have training underway then be called to serve on top of it!). We are grateful that I work for myself, so I can set my own schedule and pace. Although we aren't keeping life on hold for adoption any more, this work arrangement for me can easily be adjusted with short notice. We expect our plans for my work schedule will be a perfect fit as we look at our anticipated family life this fall. Shipton will be 5 years old, so all 4 of our kids will go to an all day homeschooling co-op group one day a week. That is just enough time to teach the 2 1/2 hours Yoga Therapy Course, take a few QNRT clients, then be back home with the kids for the rest of the week as a homeschooling mama and free up our weekends from clients. I love that we have found a way that I can have the best of both worlds!

I feel so privileged and blessed for the treasured experiences, growth, and knowledge that I have had in the past 12 month in all areas of my life. <3 I have grown so much personally through the events of the past year, and I am in awe to be in so many positions to influence, love, and reach others right now as well.

Just home from a temple trip.

This girl has grown up so much!!! Her 12th B-Day is right around the corner. With our church's announcement of changes to age requirements, Sennika has started to attend the Young Women's Program, and has her very first temple recommend! She has jumped right in, and attends the temple most weeks, usually with her own family names. Because of previous surgeries for her ears, she refused to do baptisms, :) but happily does Confirmations. She has set a goal to visit all the temples in Utah in 2019. So far we have been to 3...14 more to go. :) She has high hopes to finish the Personal Progress program before it changes in January, and is working feverishly away to accomplish it.

One of her chicken's died a few months ago. That broke her little heart.:( Since then, she has made the decision to re-home the rest. We found an adorable farm with an attentive family for one chicken, and tentatively will be re-homing the other two to some friends from our homeschooling co-op group. She hopes to get a little pet parakeet instead. <3

Senn is still at the same dance studio; however, she is doing tumbling this year and loves it. She is learning how to add strength to her super flexibility, and it has been so good for her to learn that new skills require patience and practice. We are so proud of how much she has improved and that she has stayed with it even though it has been difficult for her. She still loves to read, and spends more free time in a good book than on anything else! She still loves to draw and create. She has made several good friends her age this year, which has been so fun for her. Two of her friends are also homeschooled, and moved just around the block, so they get together as often as possible. She is a wonderful help around the house, and can be really sweet with the boys (but still struggles with their teasing)! We are grateful for this amazing daughter of ours!!!

So typical of Gavin and his sense of humor

Gavin turned 10 last fall. He has loved his weekly Urban Gym class! It's boys' gymnastics, but it's so hip and cool. The boys learn how to maneuver over obstacles and do flips, etc. He has consistently been at the top of his gym class, and comes home sweaty every week.

Scouts has continued to be fun for him as well. He is a Webelos now. We just got home tonight from the Cub of the Year banquet where he was recognized as the Cub of the Year for our unit! He will get to march in the Peach Day's parade and help carry flags, and is looking forward to it.

He has made several good friends this year, too. One is his bestie at church and scouts. He gets to sit by him most weeks, and his friend's mom even has these two going to ward choir every week! His other two best friends also homeschool, so it has been so much fun to get in lots of play dates together with good friends.

Mark bought a wii this fall. I'm still not sure how I feel about it,:) but Gavin has loved exploring this new world. He especially loves the Lego movie wii games. We have a game store near our house, so most of his chore money has been going to games lately.

Gavin folded 10 origami claws :)

He still loves Origami and Legos. He still loves riding his bike, scooting, jumping on the tramp, playing in the sandbox...digging holes...just being a boy playing in the outdoors. We love having Gavin in our family, and enjoy his playful sense of humor (most of the time). :) He is a good brother, especially to his little brothers, and has been a huge help around the house and yard lately.

Le went to scouts like this one week. I was dying (and still
laughed as I pulled this picture up tonight). THIS KID!!! <3

Leland has had a wonderful year of growing, too. He started taking karate and is so proud to have two stripes on his belt now. He came home just this week and announced that he chopped a board with his leg. :) He has made a really sweet friend in the stake who has started going to karate now too. It has been so good for him to build his confidence and have practice of proper expectations in a formal classroom setting.

We are so proud of Leland's decision to be baptized last year! He tries so hard to be good and understand how to use the gift of the Holy Ghost. <3 He is so extremely honest, and we appreciate that he is truthful, even when he is worried about the consequences or outcomes from the choices or mistakes he has made.

Leland can be rowdy; however, most of the time he is gentle and sweet. Gavin and Leland (and usually Shipton) love playing together both inside and outside, alone, together, or with friends. As hard as it was for me to accept that I have 3 little boys because I never pictured myself as a boy mom, :) I am so glad now! These three are such great friends. Every day is an adventure! Once school and chores are done, the rest of the day is free time, which these boys usually spend on creative play...building, experimenting, creating, outside play. And Leland is right in the middle of it (which is usually Gavin initiated, :) but Leland is happy to join in).

I'm not sure why, but Leland has been way into frogs lately...so he got a chocolate frog for Valentine's Day. :)

Leland has gotten really good at folding origami along with Gavin. We just shuffled bedrooms around, and he has his own room for the very first time. He is loving the chance to spread out and set things up how he wants them to be. He is also loving scouts as a Wolf. We are grateful to have Leland in our family and his big and tender heart!!!

Ship in his PJ Mask suit. This stage is so fun! ...but the
superhero dress ups are starting to die out in the past few
months.

Shipton has had a big year too. He went to preschool, and loved the interaction with other kids his age. Where there is almost a 4 year space between Leland and Shipton, he has been lonely for other preschoolers who enjoy the same things he does. He also adored his teacher, Miss Kerri. He had a blast having his own special time...and I used that quiet time to get through curriculum for the 3 older kids. Win-win! Sadly, he has been very clingy after some major family changes last month, and hasn't been willing to go all month. :( He finally slept in his own bed again for the past 2 nights in a row, so we are hopeful he will get back to his confident and independent little self again soon.

As mentioned, he loves playing with his brothers. He still loves cats...not sure when that will change (if ever). :) When we go to the library, he only picks books with cats on the cover.

He loves building with his duplos, playing with his robotic cats, and digging in the sandbox. He was in one of my kids yoga classes at the kids gym and has become a little yoga expert. He asked Mark a few days ago, "Dad, do you know why I'm so fast?" (Mark was stumped). "It's because I do yoga!" <3 He teaches ANYBODY who will listen all of the different yoga poses and promises them that they will be fast and strong if they do it too. :)

Have you noticed yet that he does thumbs up whenever he poses for pictures? :) Ship dressed up like an Indian around Thanksgiving (for preschool).

Ship and Dad are even better pals than before (if that is even possible!). He wants to go wherever Dad goes. He loves to help, especially in the kitchen and with chores around the house. He loves to color, draw, and paint. He is starting to read simple words! It is so stink'n cute to hear him sound out letters. I can't explain it, but he gets a completely different voice and makes sure to double the sounds for word with double consonants. :) Ship is a streak of sunshine and we can't imagine life without him!!!

These are origami swords...made out of paper with a little tape...they even have sheaths. Not sure if you are as impressed as I am, but these are the kinds of things these creative boys pump out daily.

My 16 year old sister moved in with our family last March and just went home this February. We learned so much as a family, and especially parents. We weren't expecting a teen for several more years, so it was good life experience to be plunged into the world of teens with no forewarning or preparation. It has left a hole in our hearts, but we are grateful that we could open our home (and hearts) to her.

One of the kids' favorite stores: BAM! It's a Lego store. Here the kids are building custom mini figures.

Last fall, we also had an Expectant Mom with a baby girl coming this spring reach out to us. We were connected through a common friend on FB. Things happened quickly, and within a month of her reaching out, we made the decision to temporarily house her and her toddler (who she planned to continue to parent). Although she changed her mind in February and has decided to parent her baby instead, again, we learned so much as a family, and especially as a couple. How can you love somebody with your heart wide open and without holding to expectations? Although we weren't perfect, we feel we approached this situation with nothing but love for all involved. We respect her decision and hope for their bright and happy future together as a family.

Decorating Christmas cookies

We weren't as consistent around the holidays for Mommy's and Daddy's clubs, but we were consistent at having 1:1 or 2:1 time with each child weekly. Mark and I believe that this is one reason the kids did as well as they did with so many extra household members. Mark and I treasure the time we have with our children individually. Come, Follow Me has been an answer to our prayers. Although I can't fully explain how or why, but it is almost like it has helped bridge the gap and fill in the holes with the fast-paced life we have been living this year. Our stake has family time every Sunday where no meetings are allowed to be scheduled. Although our week is full of commitments, we make full use of this time every week by studying the family section of Come, Follow Me, then spending time together playing board games, playing outside, catching up with each other, cooking or baking together. We have loved it!!! Mark and I have done our best to not schedule meetings or commitments after family time either, so we have every Sunday from 4 pm to bedtime together every week.

At the Grand Canyon

Although we have experienced so much this year that could have easily driven us apart, it has actually brought us closer together. We have learned new levels of communication and team work as a couple. We have been consistent about connecting every day (which has some times been tricky when one of us is traveling), a weekly date night, couple prayers, and regular temple attendance. A few weeks ago Mark asked me what I have gained eternally from the experiences of this year. I love that we can both draw on the experiences of the past 12 months and they will be ours forever. We are so grateful for each other!!!

I have left the blog un-updated for so long because living life was too fast paced to document it for the first 6 months, then we were expecting to be taking this blog down with being matched for adoption. We don't know what the future will hold. We still hope that it will somehow and sometime include adoption...but if not, we see how greatly blessed we have been (and are). During our couple prayers this morning, Mark thanked our Heavenly Father for the blessings He has continued to pour out on our family over and over again. Truly, we are so blessed!!! God is good, and we have been showered with His love in this time and season of our lives.

I Love Jesus and I Cuss...

I was in CA soaking up my beach front hotel and my yoga teacher training for kids when I received one of the most shocking phone calls of my life. Our stake president had texted me and asked if he could meet with Mark and I. We had been called as stake sex addiction specialists, so we figured it was either for that or we had stake conference coming up and he was going to ask us to speak.  We were curious, but we really weren't worried about it. When I told him that I was in CA and the rest of my family was in ID, he said he would get back with me. Within a few hours he texted again and said that because of my return travel plans and his travel plans to leave town for a business trip, we would need to meet over the phone instead. By the time of the appointment, Mark was back in UT, so Mark headed to our stake president's office and they brought me in by phone.

My heart leaped and nearly stopped as I was extended the call to be our next stake RS president. A million thoughts passed through my head and a jumble of emotions rose up in my heart. Being such a visual person, I wish I could have SEEN Mark during this conversation, but he was very tender, encouraging, and supportive. We both accepted the call to serve with great emotion and awaited more details and information. Mark called me back after he left our stake president's office and we had a tender conversation together. Mark is such an amazing man! He is so supportive of me and quietly takes care of all the behind-the-scenes things so that I can give and love and serve. I truly am grateful for such a wonderful spouse; we are learning to be a power couple and accomplish great things side-by-side.

And so began the long and sleepless nights! In addition to worrying about gathering the rest of my presidency, there was something else repeating over and over again in my head. At first I couldn't even fully identify and articulate the racing thoughts. My mind just kept playing whatever it was incoherently in the back of my mind. It wasn't until almost a week and a half after accepting the call that I had a conversation with my sister that helped me pinpoint exactly what it was. She told me about a t-shirt she used to have that said, "I love Jesus and I cuss." We had a good laugh about it, but as Mark and I went up to our bedroom for the night, I burst out crying. That is exactly the problem! I really do love Jesus and I really do cuss! (I am completely serious about this. I had frozen my emotions because of deep pain and fear. Once they finally began to thaw with recovery work and rebuilding trust, an exclamation mark behind what I said wasn't enough to express the damed up emotions. Ask my kids, I have gotten so much better, but still...I do love Jesus and I really do cuss! I'm working on this.)

...And then a flood of nearly nonsense words tearfully surfaced while Mark patiently listened. "I am supposed to be the stake RS president and sometimes I still cuss!...Sometimes I yell at my kids!...I have a husband who looks like a biker...I still have last Autumn's leaves to rake up in my yard, I have a lawn full of dandelions, and flowerbeds full of grass...my kids scream and yell during Sacrament meeting (among other things)...I have been through betrayal trauma. Nobody even wants to talk about that and here we are so open about it...I am too young...I don't crochet lace doilies...and I'm not sweet and soft-spoken, but such a bold woman. I can't be the stake RS president and be who I am at the same time! I can't be both!!!" And suddenly I knew exactly what had been constantly chattering in the back of my mind. And it was simply beautiful to come full circle.

All of us have gaps, places we fall terribly short, or paradoxes. We know who we want to be or who we "should" be. We know what we want to be doing or what we "should" be doing, yet at the very same moment, most of the time we aren't that person...yet. We really can be both at the same time, and we will be both until we aren't both any more. These gaps don't just go away. We won't come to find ourselves and remember who we really are any other way. This is exactly where we must start! As we discover and acknowledge these gaps (rather than ignoring them) and as we invite and allow our Savior to enter into the details of working through them (rather than justifying or minimizing), then we slowly become the child of God that has been buried deep inside from living on a fallen planet surrounded by mortals.

And then in that moment of Light shifting my insight, so many other experiences and moments of inspiration since the call were strengthened and reinforced. During one long night, God answered my prayers for peace by reminding me of many tender, tender experiences where my family and I had been ministered to through our darkest hours. He showed me that even though there are so many things that I am and so many mistakes I have made or things I have done, that isn't why He needs me right now at this time in this capacity. He simply needs me because I understand ministering because of the ways we were taught. We were truly surrounded by Christ-like individuals who had found their Savior and allowed Him to work in their lives. The ways they lifted, blessed, and strengthened us simply happened naturally. It was an outward manifestation of what had/was going on inside of them.  Although I have many weaknesses, shortcomings, and flaws, God still needs me. He needs me not in spite of all I have been through, but because of what I have been through. Being reminded that "I love Jesus and I cuss," helped me to know where my focus needs to be: ministering from the inside out. When my stake president extended the call, he said we are to assist in the Priesthood work of the stake. (It's not a women and the Priesthood thing!) That means anything that leads individuals and families to understand, prepare to make, remember, and honor covenants and the associated ordinances. Our efforts to minister are to not only meet individuals needs, but ultimately to point them to Jesus Christ and covenants---for it is through the covenants that our Savior is given increased power to draw us to Him as we turn to Him and choose Him more fully by entering into and keeping them. So, God needs me to support our stake as we learn to minister from the inside out in ways that lead individuals to covenants.

As I knew why God needed me, it made the important task of calling my presidency easier. It became very clear who to call. We need other women who understand ministering as well. We need women who will help our relief societies and wards to be safe havens where women and their families are truly loved and accepted regardless of outward appearances, past life experiences, our current choices or sins. My presidency is made up of brave women who have been through difficult experiences and love our Savior. Each one is a strong woman who will bring unique talents and abilities as we serve the women in our stake.

There have been so many tender mercies in the past 2 weeks as I have processed through all of this. Quiet moments were very difficult because I would be flooded with thoughts and emotions that needed to be unpackaged. Just as I would feel settled and excited about this calling, I would discover yet another layer of insecurities, worries, and inadequacies to work through with Heavenly Father. On and on it went with some tiny traces still clinging on. There was one day that I decided to go for a walk. Miraculously, a friend had decided to walk the same route and my heart was lifted and lightened through our friendship. Another day, an amazon package with a book written by President Nelson showed up on my doorstep. The books' primary message is, "God uses the unlikely to accomplish the impossible." (I later found out that this was from my brother and sister-in-law, but oh, how I needed to learn that last week!) There were "random" texts of kind words and encouragement from friends who didn't even know that I was wrestling so intensely. I finally emailed our families after a week. I could feel the strength of their prayers helping me to push back the darkness. One of the sweetest tender mercies was the morning of stake conference. I had been asked about a month ago to conduct a children's choir for conference. We sang 3 prelude songs and then 2 others during the meeting. Although to some it seemed that it would add to my burden to have "double duty" on such a big day, Heavenly Father knew I would have been a nervous wreck. Instead of worrying as the meeting was about to start or before I spoke, I had two of my favorite things---children and music---to focus on instead of my new calling be announced and the invitation to bear my testimony during the meeting. I was completely overwhelmed after coming home and checking my phone. Complete strangers had looked up my number on the stake directory and sent me extremely kind and encouraging text messages. There were also sweet notes from others who know me and love me that have meant so much. I have been powerfully reminded of how much my Heavenly Father loves me! I have felt His arms around me in the past 2 weeks and I know He will continue to sustain me and meet my needs as I seek to do all in my power and in His strength to build Zion in our stake.


We were set apart yesterday as a presidency. We were each given powerful blessings and I literally felt the mantel settle on me. It is difficult to describe. There is a love and concern for the women and their families and their well-being that I cannot fully articulate. In my blessing, I was reminded that the greatest potency I will have as a president is to minister to the ward leaders and teach them about ministering rather than focusing all of my efforts on the women in the stake (but as I have opportunities to minister one-by-one, to do it). That was really amazing to consider on. In this calling, I have a much greater capacity to reach a greater circle of influence by teaching others and then supporting them as they primary do the reaching. It reminds me of my patriarchal blessing where it talks about how my efforts will touch others so they will be able to brighten the lives of others, too. God promised me that I will develop a meekness and gentleness that will make it possible for all women to be comfortable with interacting with me---where strong women can be intimidating to some personalities---but He told me to never bury my light or my talent. I have been aware of this need for a long time and I am excited for this. I was told to keep my primary focus on my home and my family and blessed with courage to cancel meetings or make any changes necessary to meet the needs of my family first. I have worried a lot about having such a young family with this calling. I was reminded that God knows and will give us what we need. I was told that heaven is aware of this call and that God is preparing angels to help us accomplish what needs to be done. It was such a beautiful blessing! It was a privilege to hear the rest of my presidency members' blessings too and God's awareness of each one of them. I learned about their strengths and the important reasons why each one of them is in this presidency. After we were all set apart, our stake president reminded us to keep it simple. He encouraged us to cut out any frills and to focus on the spiritual needs. I'm not a crafty/cutesty/make things pretty person, so I am excited for that!:)

Overall, I am humbled, amazed, and in awe for the beautiful opportunity and privilege. God knows each one of us and prepares us to bless and strengthen others in their moments of need. In the early hours of the morning yesterday as I rested in God's love for me, I could see that in order for me to serve at this time in this way, it was vital for me to pass through my greatest heartaches. It has shaped me and refined me and these difficulties granted opportunities for me to learn about ministering by God sending countless angels on earth to teach me and my family and to help us find our Savior and understand the power of covenants. Now I get to pass that on in such a big way! God is simply amazing!!!

Mom's B-Day

Gavin and Shipton helping me put the demo boxes together.  It has been about a 6 months process start to finish, but we were given the go-ahead to assemble care packages for the women in our stake battling betrayal trauma from a spouse's sexual infidelity! Each item was clearly meant to be included (check out Mark's video HERE to see what they are like). I was expecting a request for maybe 20, but the bishops asked for 60 (so we did 70 to have a 10-box-buffer). My family could help me do a few of these, but 70!?! I quickly realized this was bigger than us, which is how it should be. As I considered possible dates, I realized my B-Day was coming...I cannot think of a better way to celebrate my life than by making others' lives brighter! With amazing connections that were truly God sent, everything arrived on time. As we made our final preparations for these, it has been a beautiful experience for me. There is healing in paying it forward, making the path smoother and clearer for others, and pointing others to Christ. It doesn't change what happened, but at the same time, it softens the experiences from the past and allows even more love into my own heart. I believe one reason we go through difficulty is that God can use us to reach His other children; we would be unable to do so without our experiences.

Sennika helping to carefully measure, cut, and heat seal-the ribbon. The care packages came together with our entire family working together on the prep work. I appreciate their love, support, and interest. I didn't remember to take a single picture or movie clip of my "B-Day party" (our care package assembly party), but it was incredible. It gave me goose bumps seeing all of the beautiful boxes lined up against the wall, knowing they represent women who will hopefully have a smoother healing process because of our efforts. I cannot fully articulate what it meant to me that night. As my life was completely shattered, I was alone and had no idea where to turn. We had already been working with therapists for about 6 months previously and things had only gotten worse. I felt like I was the only one in my situation and I had no idea where to start, let alone what to do. But to have an entire roomful of people coming together to support these packages plus easily double that who couldn't be in two places at once, did something to my heart. People care! They really do! These people were there because they care about me...but they also care about women facing betrayal trauma. I have no idea what the chances are that any of the women who receive one of these packages will see this post, but if they do, I want them to know that they are so loved. Complete strangers love you. Your friends, family, and leaders love you. God loves you. You are known, even in moments of darkness, despair, and darkness. I am kicking myself that I didn't film it for you so you could experience that, but know that you aren't alone!

A woman in my self-reliance group made me a birthday basket. It was so thoughtful!

Mark scheduled my B-day off, which was a nice surprise. We snuck away for lunch together.

My beautiful roses aren't as fresh today as they were when Mark gave them to me, but their fragrance has filled the house.

It was a wonderful celebration surrounded by those who love me. I appreciate family and friends who couldn't be with me in person, but still reached out on my special day.

Hello...and almost goodbye...Autumn..IPad picture download

This was from Ship's b-day back in April.  I'm not sure if it made it up or not.

I think we had other pictures of our big Easter Egg hunt, right?  Since Easter is close to my b-day, I asked for an Easter party and invited my friends (I was the primary chorister at the time, so we invited my primary kiddos and their families).  Our own kids were happy egg fillers and hiders.

This picture gives me reassurance that sometimes I am doing my job right as a Mama.  I LOVE that these two read and read and read.

Sennika drew a picture of Dad. :D

"Super Cat!"  AKA Shipton (note the awesome cape).  Essential to save the day...along with arms flailed behind him so it swooshes after him as he runs. :)

Gavin helped me paint.  I love this color!  It's Robin Egg Blue.

Sennika and I sent all of the boys off camping (this is the first year we haven't had Ship stay with us).  We had so much needed "G.T.," or "Girl Time."  I never expected to have so many boys and only one daughter.  I don't regret the mix, it has simply surprised me.  Being so feminine, I wasn't expecting to many boys.  We love them, but we also love doing things that only girls can do.  We had some extra special time that night.  It was stormy and Senn was scared by the wind.  She crawled into my bed shortly after we had said goodnight.  We stayed up taking WAY too late.  Keeping a strong relationship with each one of our children is important to both of us as parents.  The children behave differently with individual time with one or both parents than in group interactions.  Although there are a million ways I can use my time, I was always keep a flexible enough schedule to make time to stay close to each of my children.  Some day it would be fun to actually get to purchase the baby girl clothes Senn and I sometimes window shop for.  (Senn usually begs to pass through the baby aisle at walmart to take in the cuteness). In the future it may be wonderful for Senn to have a sister to love as only sisters can and one more daughter to enjoy G.T. with.  Until then, we will keep enjoying our time as the only girls in this boy-infested family. lol.:)

This is my Grandma O (my mom's mom) and my mom.  We got together with most of my sisters for a Mother's Day tea party in Idaho.

Have I talked about the chickens?  I think so, right?  We got little puff balls on Easter weekend and started our flock.  Senn literally calls them her babies.  She LOVES the little bird brains!  They seem to love the kids too.  They race to the door of the hen house when they hear them open the backdoor to the house.  They have spent more of their free time this summer playing with the chickens than any other way.

Field trip to the local botanical gardens.

Gavin all ready to head out for his first scout camp!

Field trip to the Bird Refuge.

Solar Eclipse!

Leland's b-day piñata!

I was dying over this card!  Gavin took a picture off of Leland's poster board and used a body he cut out from his Friend Magazine.  I'm not entirely sure why it hit me as so funny...even know I am still chuckling about it!

Gavin has been my regular yoga buddy lately.  The other kids only have the patience and attention for a 3 minute mediation each, but Gavin has been doing my daily practice with me (30 min).

Senn makes a lovely yoga buddy too!

Senn helping Ship build magforms.

The yoga girls again.

I was up the apple tree trying to get the remaining apples.  Senn thought it was pretty funny.

Shipton with another favorite cape (a V-Day tablecloth). :)

Senn nervously about to head into her first day of dance class.  She did ballet back in ID.  We finally got her into a super fun class here in UT.

Gav again.

I don't know why, but this felt like such a magical moment.  Everyone was finishing up lunch.  I love when they all decide to sit at the counter and I can look into all 4 of their faces (our table only fits 3 chairs per long side, so I always have one next to me).

Oh, the toilet paper! :s  I have a Preschooler Halloween album of music on my IPad.  Ship loves to listen to it over and over.  One day, with Dad's permission, he decided to turn himself into a mummy while he listened to it...except he ended up turning the house into a mummy instead.  He was so excited for Halloween this year.  It was adorable!

My boys!  Look at how comfy that both look!  This is the one and only day Mark was clean shaven in 2017.  We found out he didn't get into the Book of Mormon movie clips for this year (they will continue to record next summer, but won't start accepting applications for a few months---then they are suppose to update the profiles every 3 months to demonstrate hair and beard growth).  Mark and Gavin had auditioned for Savior of the World.  Mark received an e-mail telling them that the didn't get it.  So he shaved.  And then the night he shaved I received a voicemail.  There had been a mistake and they really did cast Mark and Gavin!  He frantically called back the next morning to let them know he had just shaved.  They reassured him that they didn't cast him because of his beard. :)  So he started growing again the very next day.

We don't usually do yoga all together at once, but this day we did.

About to head out for dinner and the General Women's meeting.

It's tiring work to be a preschooler!  Truly!

Senn was asked to dog sit.  I think Ship was excited to see the dog found one of his favorite hiding places too: under the desk.

Oh, these two!

Senn's dance company had a super fun Halloween party.  She loved her face paint.  I love her!!!

Another yoga buddy shot.

Can you spot my two spiders---Gavin and Leland---at the park?

Ship (and a touch of Le).

Dad took the boys to the park.  They had a hey-day gathering hazelnuts.  Here is Le's "stash."

Gav

Ship

Carving pumpkins!  This is Gavin

Dad and the boys.

Le

The weather his so different here than in ID.  It was so hot outside the day before Halloween that the kids got umbrellas to block the sun!

Mom and Ship.

The cutest ninja turtle ever!

Hmmm...Le gives him the run for his money though.

All four kids about to hit the neighborhood for trick-or-treating.

Just so classic!  I have no idea how other moms get all of their kids to look and actually smile.  Haha...but this definitely shows their personalities. :)

Leland's bday cake!

Gavin and Le trying to position the ramp to launch cars down the stairs.

Dad's B-Day cake!